Rejuvenation of My Aching, Still-Beating Heart
My heart beats on a whim that one day I will find someone who TRULY understands and comprehends the life I lead and how my thought processes operate. The pickings have been slim up to this point but my blind voyage will continue on until I have found the woman who shall tame my restless soul. There was one special woman I think could have been the unmistakable “one” but the timing wasn’t right and the opportunity escaped our regretful grasps and was gone before we knew it. I will never make that mistake again, I can promise you that. She’s out there somewhere, awaiting our random encounter and preparing for our inevitable introduction that will hopefully prove to be DESTINY at work behind the scenes. Bridges burn, people learn and the tides continue to turn….
As I move forward in my eternal pursuit of happiness I hope to encounter my “soul mate”(if ever there were such a thing but my fingers REMAIN crossed) and share the boundless endeavors of “true love” and meander aimlessly into the hazy sunset living happily ever-after…. Sounds like a fairy tale ending but deep down we all wish for exactly that in one way, shape or form and DESERVE it for that matter. My heart may be bent and possibly a little misshapen but it is certainly far from broken; toughened over the years, this resilient organ still beats unfalteringly second after second. It never ceases to amaze me just what we choose to subject ourselves to continually and how far we keep pushing our limits daring to reach our breaking points at all costs… left alone, scratching our heads in confusion, contemplating on what EXACTLY went wrong THIS time.
Hopefully, I’ll gather the answers necessary to move on to my next voyage awaiting departure at a time not yet revealed to my weary body, brain, heart and soul. My EPIC journey awaits… the anticipation engulfs me and has instilled a more than welcome sense of serenity and peacefulness within me. I must be patient and intently watch for the subtle signs that will light the way and lead me away from this darkness that has held me captive for far too long. Salvation and redemption will return to me once more for I refuse to be held down by the chains that have been placed upon me. Mine is a free soul and will only remain imprisoned for a short stint; breaking boundaries and blazing trails into the unknown and undiscovered upon recognizing its very own inhibitions rendered by the shackles forced upon me.
Freedom is the only way for me to flourish… leading a monotonous life with stifling and ridiculous boundaries and rules implemented every step of the way has limited my potential and minimized my capabilities. Love knows no bounds. There is an inferno inside my aching heart that grows upon each furious heartbeat; building for the perfect outburst, waiting quietly to release its volatile yet strangely magnetic and compelling, pure and unfiltered contents……. Until that highly sought after explosion, I shall await in solemnity and seek solace amongst family and close friends. I’ll be waiting….
Atlas 06/05/2011
